Yes I'm excited, but this year I seem to be happier. I still think about what the doctors initially said. But someone pointed out to me that I need to stop freaking out over what COULD happen and focus on now.
It's hard to get the balance right. I still need to take precautions with people coming around. If their sick they can't come in. But I am having less frequent nightmares. I still check Carsyn 100 times at night. But I'm not having an anxiety attack every time I do. I didn't realize how toxic that was getting for me. I felt crazy, every night. Not so much now, I'm getting there.
So, my baby is seven.
SEVEN!!!
I'm over the moon. I can't believe seven years ago today I was in the hospital. I still hadn't held my baby boy, but I had met him. And he was so handsome. Even more so now.
That day was the craziest, yet most exciting day of my life.
Today he's smiling, compared to the screaming we heard seven years ago. That kid was all the way down the hall and I could still hear him screaming.
That was right before I met him, and I think the moment everyone realized that this little boy was stronger than what everyone initially thought.
Seven years I have been a mom.
That's crazy.
Carsyn is getting the new rascal flats album that came out today and going to the zoo( hopefully) Three things he really loves. Rascal flats, the zoo and a carousel ride(theres a carousel at the Erie zoo)
If no zoo today then Saturday and his birthday party is Sunday :)
And it's gorgeous outside! So he'll be spending his day outdoors:)
So until next time <3
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